Just a bit of random foodness...

I finally got some sleep last night!! yay!! Having so much trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep lately prompted me to finally try some unisom... And oh my goodness was it magical. I slept very soundly last night... not as much as I normally like, but the quality was there.

Anyway, today I started out my day with 1/4 cup of steel cut oats with a large spoonful of pumpkin, a little brown brown sugar, dash of cinnamon, and a dash of milk. I did NOT like the pumpkin. Yuck. Take two tomorrow will just be my usual embellishments... brown sugar and milk.

I then grabbed a cup of coffee with a little half n half and ran out the door to my Bible study brunch. There I ate about two cups of spinach salad topped with mangos and strawberries and dressed it with cucumber cilantro dressing... (homemade by my wonderful mother in law, and it was amazing and so healthy!! Can't wait to post the recipe!!) On the side, I ate probably a good cup and a half of fresh cut fruits and berries. SO yummy. Oh and I ate a tiny sliver of quiche to see if I could tolerate it... which I did.

THEN, when I got home, I did a "chia shot" as I kindly call it. I put a tbsp of chia seeds in a small cup, added an ounce of juice and chug it/refill as needed to get all the seeds. Super nutritious! I also had a fiber bar, and picked some pecans off the french toast casserole I made for my Bible study brunch. That was a mistake. Mild attack as a result of that... :(

For a snack, I munched on a few black bean quinoa chips and a tbsp of hummus...

For dinner, I sauteed about 2 cups of kale in a teaspoon of olive oil and a dash of garlic salt and pepper. Then I had a rosemary biscuit as a treat, and ate a broiled bartlet pair topped with a TINY bit of mozzarella cheese. I decided to experiment a little to see if I can further define my limits. I did just fine with that so now at least I know how much mozzarella I can eat. I finished dinner with a tbsp of almond butter and another chia shot. A good day I should think! Lots of dark leafy greens... I would like to increase my amounts of dark leafy greens though. Perhaps in a smoothie? We'll see.

As far as drinks go, I try to keep it to just water for the most part... minus my morning coffee and juice in my chia shots. Other than that I just drink water.

Okay... hopefully tomorrow will be even better. :)

24 week update

Lately I've sort of kicked back and put things like my blog, social media, TV, and other such things on the back burner. Not that I was super great about blogging to begin with, but I just needed to spend more time in God's word as well as enjoying my children a little more. I've found it has helped ease a lot of my anxieties and worries about all things pregnancy and birth. Not sure why I've struggled so much lately, but I feel like it's the enemy's way of trying to take me down... but that just won't happen.

Anyway, I've been feeling... okay lately. Not the greatest, but I could definitely feel worse! This pregnancy has taken a huge toll on me emotionally, so I think the aches and pains I've been feeling physically have been a lot less tolerable because I've been struggling to keep myself together. I have tried to make a conscious effort to keep myself in a good mood as best I can, and maintain high levels of patience with people and with my kiddos. I've found that taking things out of my life like TV shows, groups on facebook, (wasting time on facebook in general), remaining somewhat oblivious to current events... those things have helped me to keep a positive mindset and focus on replacing negatives with positives. Call me ignorant, I call it blissfully unaware for my own sanity. 

I think part of my difficulty is that our little family is transitioning and trying to find balance with Jeff's new work schedule. He now works from 11pm-7am Thursday through Monday, and has Tuesday's and Wednesday's off. THAT has been a huge deal for me. I didn't realize how much things would change with that... Not only do I struggle with insomnia while pregnant, I struggle with staying asleep... Especially when Jeff is gone... It's like sleeping with one eye open. So if I don't get much sleep between the time Jeff leaves and returns from work, that's just too bad. I can't just wake him up so I can take a nap... The kids need me and Jeff needs a good solid sleep so he can work safely and come home in one piece. Not that I mind being up with my kiddos... that's my joy!! I love being a stay at home mom for them. It's what I always wanted for my children. But I'm not going to say it's easy keeping them quiet, chasing them around, entertaining them, doing my cleaning, cooking, and taking care of my pregnant self... especially not having enough sleep. Adjusting to being alone at night and most of the day has not been easy for me, but I know eventually I'll find balance and get used to a new routine. At least he has a good paying job right?!?

As far as baby goes... all seems to be progressing smoothly! I'm measuring perfectly, and baby had a super strong heartbeat today. I can definitely feel that baby is growing rapidly... I can see my baby moving around all the time, and kicks and punches are not so gentle anymore. Baby is also all over the place... I feel the baby super low and also a few inches past my belly button... This tells me baby is probably on the taller side in comparison to Joey and Annie, or this baby likes to stretch out more than they did. This little one also seems to enjoy pushing back when I press my hand on my belly. It's been a fun little game we've been able to play lately. I so enjoy feeling baby move and seeing the movements as well. Makes it seem more real that we're indeed having another baby, and it's a good bonding experience before we get to meet. So, all in all, baby is doing quite well in there. My weight gain has also been pleasingly under control. As of now, I've gained about 7-8 pounds... which is a little less than I had gained at this point in pregnancy with Annabelle... I won't even mention what I weighed at this point with Joey... yikes!!

I have to say, I believe part of my slow weight gain has to do with the fact that my gallbladder is so angry all the time. I've pinpointed a few things that trigger attacks, but sometimes I just don't know what triggers certain attacks. Since I started having issues with it at the beginning of April, I've noticed myself slowly phasing out foods that didn't used to bother me at the beginning of this month... I talked to my doctor about it today and he said that even though my test results were clear, this is something that happens a lot. So he recommended I eliminate meat and dairy to see if that helps, minus the few things I can eat. (Lightly seasoned chicken, fat free milk, small amounts of half n half in my coffee...that's about it right now). So now I'm learning how to be a vegetarian. It's a little overwhelming right now trying to monitor my food intake and ensure that I'm getting enough protein... as well as other nutrients. I've been told it gets easier once you get the hang of it. So... in order to help myself keep track of what I'm eating, I've decided to blog it out and include recipes that I decided I like.

This will be an interesting adventure for sure. Hopefully there will be aspects of this diet change that I will like enough to stick around after baby comes. I will still be looking forward to enjoying a nice expensive steak when this is all said and done! Assuming my gallbladder goes back to normal. I still like my meats.... just cutting them out for now. I have also decided to try and eat as much gluten free food items as possible (with a few exceptions here and there). Having Annie on a gluten free diet is easier when there are at least two of us eating that way, and it also makes her more interested in eating things I offer her if I'm eating them too. Trader Joe's has been awesome for gluten free food!! So anyway... here's what I ate today:

(I was feeling icky this morning so I skipped breakfast and just drank water... naughty girl... I know...)

Caramel latte with nonfat milk from starbucks, and a piece of lemon loaf. I then snacked on some white cheddar popcorn from Trader Joe's (roughly half a cup). For lunch, I ate half a gluten free bagel with unsweetened salted almond butter (about half a tbsp), 1 tbsp of chia seeds in a small cup of apple juice, a fiber bar... and I think that's it. For dinner, I sauteed about 2 cups of kale in olive oil with fresh minced garlic and a dash of salt and pepper. I then let it cool and put a small amount of honey balsamic dressing on it and it was so good! I paired that with a rosemary biscuit... my other treat for today. I then ate a protein bar (consisted mostly of mixed nuts), 1 tbsp chia seeds in a small cup of juice... and that's all I can remember other than some fruits and veggies for snacks. I know I ate more protein, just can't remember everything I ate today. It sounds like a ton of carbs... but today was my cheat day. So anyway, for tomorrow I prepped some steel cut oats for breakfast which I'm excited to experiment with. I have a few ideas for how to dress it up in a healthy yummy way... and I also have a day of meals and snacks planned for tomorrow and will plan more meals and snacks the for the next few days. Hopefully this helps me get the hang of this. Thanks for reading friends! God bless!

20 weeks

A lot has happened this week. My plan for everything went out the window, and honestly I couldn't be more relieved.

After my last visit with the midwife, I had this strange feeling about things... About this birth, about my care... I'm not sure what it was about. But lets just say these last few weeks have been really hard on me emotionally and mentally. For whatever reason, my anxiety level has been through the roof and I've been unable to pinpoint EXACTLY what the cause was. I wasn't sure if maybe the birth center being so close to where my mom died was possibly triggering my PTSD, or if perhaps I just didn't feel it was right for me to be there anymore? I'm not completely sure. But what I did know was that my anxiety was getting out of control. I'm still dealing with it, but I've been praying a lot, talking to God, and trying to decompress my feelings as much as possible.

So, in response to everything I had been feeling and after a lot of thought and a lot of prayer, I decided to switch my care back to my regular OB/GYN. And boy... I let out a huge sigh of relief when I finally got all that out of the way, and I feel even better today since I've been able to go in and talk to my doctor about everything that's been going on. He was so very supportive, and he said that him and his nurse were so excited to have me back. That felt great to hear. I was very worried that my choice to try out something different had hindered my relationship with my doctor and the clinic staff. I truly had a great experience there when I delivered Annabelle, and to top it off my doctor even made it a point to be there and deliver her. That's not something that doctor's do very often. My experience there was satisfying, and empowering. All of my requests were met, everyone was respectful of my wishes, and nobody offered me drugs which was awesome.

Reflecting on my experience at Evergreen, I decided that I really wouldn't mind a repeat of that given all of my anxieties and reservations about the birth center. So, in conclusion to that, I am very glad I made the switch. I have no regrets, and I felt so much better about where I'm delivering my baby. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. At this point as I still deal with some anxiety, I'm just going to try my best to relax, pray, and really try to hear what the Lord has to say to me. This pregnancy has been a huge lesson to me about giving up my fears to Him. I am so far from perfect at this... I struggle daily with fear and anxiety which is NOT of the Lord. I am not to feel this way, but to trust in His plan. So much easier said than done when you're kind of a stubborn control freak... I'll get there some day.

I still whole-heartedly support midwives and their model of care. I think it's a wonderful option for women who want that type of care for a low risk pregnancy, but for some reason it's just not for me, and THAT IS OKAY. I can still have a wonderful birth at the hospital that I like, with a doctor that I like, in the same way that I would choose to deliver at the birth center... a natural unmedicated birth. I know I can do it... I've done it before and I'll do it again.

So, that's my recent change in regards to my pregnancy/birth plan. I am so totally okay with it. I have to go where I feel the most secure and relaxed. That's at Evergreen. As far as baby goes, baby has been doing quite well. I have felt A LOT more kicks lately, and it's wonderful!! I'm loving that!! I also got to see baby kick from outside my belly. That was neat because I have never seen that so early. I believe I was about 21 or 22 weeks before I was able to see Joey kick, and I know I was over 6 months along with Annie before I saw her kicks. This baby is very strong too!!

I've also noticed a lot of braxton hicks contractions, which are totally normal. They might be due to the stress and anxiety I've been feeling lately. I've been trying to rest as much as possible as well as staying very hydrated with water and gatorade. This seems to help, as well as prayer. I have to credit my Bible study that I'm doing right now too. Having something to study and dive into when I need to hear God's holy word has been really helpful to me. I've found a lot of peace in that, and I am so thankful!! Other than that, things seem to be moving right along. Baby is measuring right on schedule and my pregnancy is finally going fairly smoothly at this point... as in right now... today.

SO here's to a smooth, anxiety and stress free pregnancy and delivery. I can't wait to meet this little one, and I do hope everything goes as smoothly as it did with baby's sister. Thanks for reading friends!! God bless!!